Nothing Boring About A Cajun Shrimp Burger

Mason’s Grill
13556 Jefferson Hwy.
Baton Rouge, LA





Mason’s Grill is the embodiment of everything I love about the state of Louisiana -- the best state in America for eating.

End of discussion.

Even at an ordinary-looking non-descript place on the outskirts of Baton Rouge like Mason’s you can find something extraordinary to light up your taste buds.

I mean, this isn’t the kind of place I normally seek out.

There is nothing historic or quaint about it. It’s not some Travel Channel dining landmark.

Mason’s has no divey charm or scary clientele.

It’s just a boring looking restaurant with a big parking lot filled with pickups sitting by the side of the road patronized by local families out for a good meal.

But looks can be deceiving -- especially in the Bayou State where “a good meal” is almost never boring.

There is nothing boring about chowing down on giant dangerous reptiles -- especially the way Mason’s prepares alligator.

While I enjoy my oversized lizards fried as much as any red blooded heterosexual American male, you have to try your gator blackened just once in your life.

This alligator was generously seasoned with Cajun spices, perfect with the tangy New Orleans style remoulade dipping sauce.

Tender, juicy and packing a nice kick, Mason’s blackened gator was like a Mardi Gras parade in every bite.

So does gator taste like chicken?

Well, yeah. Kind of.

Like a swampy, greasy, delicious chicken.

While the gator is top notch, the real reason to come to Mason’s is for their famous Cajun Shrimp Burger.

This burger is epic!

A half pound of fresh ground beef spiked with jalapeno peppers is then sautéed in more jalapenos and Cajun spices.

But I’m pretty sure that is not even half of this burger’s caloric overload.

The burger is topped by a molten lava concoction of gooey Monterey Jack cheese and shrimp.

Yes. Shrimp.

On a burger.

How awesome is that?

Pretty damn awesome as a matter of fact.

And these aren’t those lame little cocktail shrimp I was expecting.

We’re talking big plump local Gulf Coast shrimp. The real deal.

The cheese/shrimp topping was thicker than the half pound burger -- and oozed appetizingly with every delicious bite.

Fortunately, Mason’s uses an industrial-sized sourdough bun fresh made from a bakery in Houston to keep it all together.

Too often these epic sized burger/condiment combinations transform into an epic failure because the buns just can’t stand up to the meat/cheese/grease assault.

But not here. Mason’s has mastered the art of burger structural integrity.

Cooked exactly the way I asked for it -- a nice medium pink with plenty of juices flowing, the burger featured a harmonious yin and yang of sweet and spicy.

The jalapenos in the beef let their presence be known, but never turned my mouth into an inferno of spice.

The jack cheese and shrimp lended a perfect sweet balance to the Cajun spices.

Definitely a Suit757 burger Hall of Famer. For sure.

Along with a side of first rate onion rings, I had trouble finishing my meal. And that’s saying something.

My bartender said most folks don’t finish the burger. And most folks don’t start with a whole appetizer of gator either.

But then again most folks ain’t Suit757.

I’m a professional after all.

The beer selection at Mason’s was decent -- for Louisiana -- a state with among the least adventurous tastes in craft beer.

Proving that Louisianans are all about the food -- not the drink, the local Canebrake from Parrish Brewing Company in Lafayette was just a bland boring wheat beer with a sweet aftertaste.

Canebrake just adds further proof to my theory that wheat beers are brewed for people who don’t actually like the taste of beer.

So much for trying new local beer I’ve never had before.

So I switched to the familiar.

Mason’s sports a nice lineup of Abita beers from the brewery down the road in Abita Springs.

I opted for my favorite Abita -- Turbo Dog.

First of all, it’s fun just telling the bar tender, “I’ll take a Turbo Dog.”

The dark heavy ale is a perfect foil to the Cajun spiced delicacies you can find on just about any menu in this state.

Even at a mundane looking place like Mason’s.

Sure, it would make for a more entertaining story if I could tell you I risked my life walking into a smoky biker bar with heads turning, beady eyes glaring, fingers on switch blades twitching as soon as I swung upon the saloon doors.

But you know what? I’ve been to enough of those places.

Sometimes it’s nice to nice to know a suit doesn’t have to risk his life to get an epic burger.

Rating: Bought the Shirt!

Make Your Own Meat Buffet™ in Baton Rouge

TJ's Ribs

6330 Siegen Ln

Baton Rouge, LA 70809
(225) 291-8100


A good tradeoff for traveling in the deep south in the summertime is the excuse to try new BBQ joints.

The smell of hickory smoke, new and exciting sauce flavors, usually a good beer or two... It makes the heat and humidity tolerable when you're on the road.

Having found my way across the country and back a few times, I've been on a mission to find the best BBQ in America for quite awhile now.

So when I was on a plane to Baton Rouge recently, I couldn't wait to ask the locals where to find the best BBQ joint in town.

But let's get one thing straight: No chain restaurants need apply. Ever.

I hear your cries of "but Famous Dave's is sooo good it doesn't matter if it's a chain", and I don't care. When I'm the road, I want real, authentic, local BBQ.

That's how I got to TJ Ribs.

TJ Ribs is a sports-themed restaurant for people that don't really like or care about sports-themed restaurants.

It boasts a pretty respectable collection of LSU sports memorabilia, including Billy Cannon’s 1959 Heisman Trophy, which they claim is larger than any other restaurant and many museums.

But it's classy - not at all tacky and overdone, and there are TV's to catch all the games, but they're not loud and obnoxious.



The waitstaff was young and energetic and seemed to really like their jobs.

The place was bright, clean, spacious, and well organized. It had a pretty comfortable dining room.

Later, when I looked at their website, I realized that's because TJ Moran, the restaurant's owner, is all about passion.

"It’s about the passion of a man who wanted the best. It’s about the passion of a staff and the dedication to the job they do. Most of all, it’s about the passion we take in serving the absolute best barbeque ribs (and more) in the region."

This seemed like the kind of place where despite being known for the ribs, I was going to want to try a little bit of everything.

The menu was pretty big, featuring your usual sports bar appetizers, a surprising number of delicious looking salads, some sandwiches, and the usual: ribs, brisket, chicken, steaks, burgers, seafood - but I was looking to go right for the combo platter.

This was where I got the night's only disappointment.

While they offered a number of different combo platters, they didn't have the comprehensive sampler. Ribs and chicken, brisket and chicken, ribs and fried shrimp, brisket and sausage... but what if you want it all?!?!?

Thankfully, this is where the fine people of TJ Ribs came in to help me out.

The result is a little something I like to call Make Your Own Meat Buffet™.



I ordered up a few of each of the staples, a couple of sides, and settled back with an Andygator from Louisiana's own Abita Brewing Company.

My compatriots were content to order off the menu; one ordering a steak, another some chicken. Not everyone is ready for the Make Your Own Meat Buffet™.

Unless you're with fellow BBQ fanatics, few will want to get a giant sampler and carve up some for everyone. So when one orders the Make Your Own Meat Buffet™ just for yourself, you'd better bring your appetite.

A small plate of TJ's famous smoked back ribs, some brisket, white meat AND dark meat chicken, and a sausage, sided with corn-on-the-cob and some spicy green beans.



Now I'm not claiming to be a trained BBQ professional, but after a few years of dedicated service to the cause, I can say I'm an experienced amateur.

And by far, the ribs were the most tender I've ever had in my BBQ career. They melted right in your mouth. Their combination of dry rub, marinating, roasting and grilling was supreme.

The chicken was equally as moist and tender, and the sausage had a really rich, earthy flavor. It could be a contender for my favorite of the plate. The brisket was dipped in au jus and that had an excellent flavor as well.

The corn was nice and sweet, and the créole seasoning gave it a really great contrast. It was tough to pick a favorite, as I usually go with green beans, and theirs were soaking in a really delicious spicy broth that included crushed red pepper flakes and tiny pieces of bacon.

My table-mates seemed to be enjoying their meals, and I did get a taste of the garlic sauteed mushrooms, which didn't disappoint.

Overall satisfaction rate of this BBQ experience was very high. I've had slightly tastier chicken, although this was tender and no slouch. The brisket wasn't my favorite, but the au jus was a great touch and really added another element.

The ribs were absolutely perfect, but the sausage was my favorite. The sides were winners and the green beans in particular make it to the Suit 1984 Green Bean Hall Of Fame.

The only advice would be a larger and more diverse sampler platter. The Make Your Own Meat Buffet™ really needs to be addressed here.

I propose a sampler platter that includes brisket, ribs, pulled chicken (as I found the chicken portions too large for a sample), sausage, some pulled pork, cajun fried shirmp, and 4 sides.

This way, everyone at the table could go family style and get a taste of everything. Couple it with a pitcher of Andygator and you could even call it a Game Day Sampler or something.

I left TJ Ribs fat and happy. I'd definitely recommend it as my new favorite BBQ joint in Baton Rouge, and I'm looking forward to Make Your Own Meat Buffet™ Part 2.

FINAL REVIEW: Seriously Thought About Buying the Shirt!

Breakfast of the Gods in Breaux Bridge

Café des Amis

140 E. Bridge St.
Breaux Bridge, LA
Visited August 22, 2010

Beer selection: Good variety.

Food: Really, really good Cajun dishes for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

The Best Breakfast in the History of the Planet!

Yeah. Go there now.

Hop a plane to Lafayette, Louisiana and take a cab to Café des Amis in nearby Breaux Bridge.

What are you doing still sitting there reading this?

I said go. Now!

Yeah, this place is THAT good.

Café des Amis serves up atmosphere and out-of-this world Creole cuisine in an old historic 19th Century downtown building in the heart of Cajun Country. They even converted an old Otis elevator from the building’s hey-day as a casket manufacturing plant into a hostess stand.

When I think of classic Louisiana Creole food, I think deliciousness and flavor.

Café des Amis takes what are already once-in-a-life-time delicacies and elevates them to the sublime.

My appetizer of Oreille de Couchon was a perfect example.

Everyone knows about New Orleans' famous Café du Monde beignets.

Once you’ve had one, you never forget the delicate texture and the warm sweetness of a fresh from the fryer beignet.

So what can a place like Café des Amis do to improve on such a perfect concept as warm fried dough covered in powdered sugar?

How about roll it up into the shape of a pig’s ear and stuff the darn thing with Cajun boudin!

Oh, yeah!

Boudin is Cajun sausage mixed with spices and rice.

It’s Cajun snack food. Breakfast, lunch or dinner.

You won’t find boudin on restaurant menus. But you will find it in every butcher shop, meat market, convenience store and truck stop from Beaumont to Baton Rogue.

Cajuns pop in, grab a link fresh from the steamer for about a buck, and enjoy the best mobile meat snack since the invention of the Slim Jim. (Ok, you’re right. The lowly Slim Jim doesn’t have anything on this delicacy).

So the concept of taking a powdered sugar, delicate ball of dough and stuffing it up with spicy Cajun sausage is beyond absurd.

And one of the top food items I have ever placed in mouth!

So while Café des Amis’ “pig’s ear” won my Greatest Food Item Ever Championship, the title was short-lived.

Try 15 minutes.

Because that is how long it took for the waitress to bring out my main dish, “Don’t Mess With My Tas-so Omelet”.

Picture this: melted Swiss cheese, spicy Cajun Tasso ham and onions sautéed in Cajun spices, all stuffed into a fluffy omelet.

Yeah, we have a new champion of the world.

The Single Greatest Breakfast of My Life was accompanied by a fresh-from-the-oven buttermilk biscuit and grits.

But not just any grits. No. Of course not.

No ordinary grits here.

How about cheesy grits studded with zesty Cajun Andouille sausage?

It was a breakfast I hoped would never end.

So I ordered desert.

Yeah, desert for breakfast. Why not?

While I’m always partial to chocolate and the chocolate pecan pie was mighty tempting, I went with a more indigenous selection, Gateau Sirop, which my excellent waitress helpfully translated for me: Syrup Cake.

As you drive across the Southwest Louisiana plains, you see one crop stretching from horizon to horizon – sugar cane. The stuff that once was used to sweeten everything from RC Cola to the Moon Pie.

Of course thanks to the infinite wisdom of the prostitutes who run our federal government, virtually nothing in America is sweetened with natural good ‘ol sugar cane any more. Not RC Cola. Not Moon Pies. Nothing.

Thanks to tariffs on imported sugar cane and taxpayer subsidies for corn, it is vastly cheaper to mass produce soft drinks, cereal, ice cream, everything, with corn syrup.

Never mind that the stuff is probably killing us. And we’re paying for the privilege through taxes and higher food costs.

But out here in this corner of fly-over country, sugar cane syrup isn’t just available, it’s a tradition. A tradition honored in no greater form than Syrup Cake, a sugar cane sweetened spice cake topped with pecans and drizzled with more pure sugar cane syrup.

Oh yeah, and Café des Amis serves it warm with a scoop of homemade vanilla ice cream.

It was a perfect way to cap off one of the greatest culinary experiences of my life.

So I’m going on record right now. If Obama ever sends me off to a FEMA camp, this is what I want for my last meal. I’ll happily spend the rest of my life pushing boulders up hill as long as I have one final memory of this little spot in the heart of Cajun Country.

Rating: Bought the Shirt!

Getting Real in Cajun Country

D.I.’s
6561 Evangeline Highway
Somewhere between Basile and Evangeline, Louisiana
Visited August 21, 2010

Beer selection: The usual suspects plus local Abita Amber

Food: Best crabs on earth!


I’m always in search of “the real deal.”

Not some lame Disneyfied version of the real deal. Not some corporate chain version of the real deal.

No. Just the real thing.

I mean, kids walk around these days wearing T-shirts of fake places.

“Eat at Stinky’s Fish Camp”.

“I Got Crabs at Nasty Nancy’s”.

“Get Some Booty at Blackbeard’s Saloon”.

Now, THAT is lame.

There are plenty of real fish camps, crab shacks and dive bars tucked away all across the backwoods and backwaters of America. There’s no need to make it up. You just need to check out “Suits in Strange Places” to know where to show up.

Like out here on a lonely stretch of Parrish Road 97, eight miles from the nearest stop sign, in the middle of the Southwest Louisiana sugar cane fields and crawfish ponds.

I’m happy to say, D.I.’s is the real deal.

D.I. is the nickname of the crawfish farmer who owns the place. He started out inviting friends over for big crawfish boils at his farm. Five bucks, all you can eat.

One thing led to the other and now half of Southwest Louisiana shows up every night.

Or at least it seemed that way on the Saturday night I pulled up in my subcompact Kia rental car.

There had to be 500 pick up trunks in the gravel parking lot. The wait to get a table was over an hour. Good ‘ol boys and gals were drinking beer in the parking lot waiting their turn to dive into the best seafood around. And that’s saying a mouthful in Louisiana.

A Cajun band was pounding out tunes on the band stand at the far end of one of the cavernous dining halls. Old-timers, kids and Cajun beauties in white cotton dresses alike were all dancing and two-stepping to the Cajun beat.

Entirely sung in French, by the way. The real deal.

What threw me off was no one was eating crawfish, the founding crustacean of the joint.

How could that be?

I expected to walk into a room full of head-sucking and tail-pinching and piles of mudbug remainders as far as the eye could see.

After all, I just ate an entire crawfish platter last night at Prejean’s off of I-49 in Lafayette. Tourists like me all from over the country were enjoying crawfish bisque, crawfish pie, fried crawfish, crawfish etouffee and crawfish fritters. And it was all delicious. Bought the damn shirt.

So what was the problem with D.I.’s?

The problem was it wasn’t crawfish season.

Oh sure, touristy places will gladly serve wide-eyed Cajun Country tourists platters of crawfish that have been frozen over from last spring. And to be honest, they can be pretty darn tasty.

But that’s not the way they roll at D.I.’s.

This is the real deal. Remember?

If crawfish are out of season, it can only mean one thing.

It must be crab season!

And that’s what everyone was waiting in the parking lot for. D.I.’s steamed and barbequed crabs.

I’ve spent plenty of afternoons sitting in the sun on the Chesapeake Bay drinking beer and picking my way through steamy piles of blue crabs covered in Old Bay.

It’s more of a social occasion than actual sustenance. In fact, I’m convinced I burn more calories than I consume when picking steamed blue crabs. Of course that is not a problem that lots of beer and hush puppies can’t solve.

So I knew I had to try some of D.I.’s steamed crabs.

But what really piqued my curiosity were the barbequed crabs.

Barbequed crabs???

My waitress helpfully brought one out to sample along with my gumbo while I worked through the menu and my Abita Amber.

D.I.’s barbequed crab can best be described as a steamed crab that goes through the added experience of having the top shell and deadman pealed off and then being baked with a dry mustard rub. Kind of like a South Carolina mustard BBQ sauce if it were in dry rub form.

As you peel, pinch, snap and hammer the crab, the barbeque rub gets all over your fingers, hands, arms, lap (no I wasn’t wearing a suit for this one, thank goodness), and thus rubs back onto the succulent crab meat.

Colonel Sanders couldn’t know anything about finger-licking good until he tried these.

I wouldn’t want to accuse my kind, helpful waitress of any kind of chicanery, but maybe she peddled controlled substances in another life.

Her trick worked.

After my first sample barbequed crab, I was hooked. Bring me more!

Part of what makes a place “the real deal” is when you can get something you’ve never had before.

It’s just that most of the things I’ve never had before aren’t this good! Where have barbequed crabs been all my life? I’ll never eat a boring old ordinary steamed crab again.

The gumbo was delicious as well, chock full of shrimp, crab and oysters.

Not to belabor the point, but gumbo, at a remote backwoods Cajun restaurant in the heart of Acadiana? Do you think it was the real deal?

Yeah, you know it.

But man can not live on crab and gumbo alone. Nope. That was just the appetizer.

I couldn’t come to D.I.’s without trying their famous “Blackened Catfish Supreme” – a big meaty catfish fillet well seasoned and smothered in crawfish etouffee. Which, to a Cajun, sounds kind of redundant since etouffee means “smothered” in French.

Smothered in what? Darned if I know.

I just call it delicious.

Each forkful of flaky catfish perfectly balanced the blackened spices and the sweet succulence of the etouffee.

On the side came a sweet potato drowning in butter and brown sugar, a hush puppy and a sweet beignet – a soft pillowy French version of fried dough.

Oh yeah. This was one crab feast I made darn sure I wouldn’t leave hungry.

As the crab carcasses piled up in front of me and the band played the final notes on the accordion and the room began to clear, I pushed back from the table and contemplated what had just happened.

One of the greatest dining experiences of my life. Once-in-a-lifetime.

Yeah, the real deal.

Rating: What do you think? Bought The Shirt!

National Lampoon’s Cajun Vacation – No Vaccination Required

Prejean’s
3480 N. E. Evangeline Trwy.
Lafayette, LA
Visited August 20, 2010

Beer Selection: Abita Amber, but nothing else to scare the tourists.

Food: Cajun food of your dreams.

Generally in my search for cool, new places to eat and drink, I try to avoid touristy places.

They suffer the same fate as those corporate chains – their food is a race to the bottom – the lowest common denominator that will appeal to the broadest masses.

And if a tourist doesn’t like it, who cares? It’s not like they are ever coming back anyway.

But there can be exceptions to this “no tourist traps” rule.

Sometimes a place can be popular with tourists not because it has broad appeal, but just the opposite. It is a safe, comfortable place to try something unique.

That describes Prejean’s to the tee.

Tourists from New Jersey with minivan and mother-in-law in tow aren’t going to be traipsing through the backwoods and bayous of Louisiana looking for some authentic redneck boiling point or fish camp.

Me, on the other hand? Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m looking for.

But not the Griswalds.

They want a quick taste of Cajun food in a setting that makes them feel like they are dining in the bayou, but without the Jurassic-sized mosquitoes, mud-stuck minivan, hepatitis vaccination or toothless roughnecks leering at their daughters.

That’s why they come to Prejean’s.

Conveniently located right on the I-49 frontage road in Lafayette – the mother city of Cajun Country, Prejean’s offers every out-of-towner exactly what they are looking for in an “authentic” Cajun restaurant.

They’ve got the giant stuffed 20 foot gator when you walk in the door, walls and ceiling decorated like a Louisiana bayou, Cajun band sitting up front playing their hearts out for the packed dining room and the requisite display of T-Shirts, coffee mugs, magnets and post cards by the exit, so you don’t have to feel the least bit embarrassed asking for a souvenir.

Heck, they’ve even got a live web-cam so you can wave to your Aunt Anne while you stuff your face with crawfish-stuffed catfish.

No doubt about it, Prejean’s is a fun, atmospheric way to experience Cajun cuisine. And boy, do they do that cuisine well.

Is the food “authentic”? I have no idea.

I’m not from here either.

But I’ll tell you this – I’d come here four nights a week if I was.

Apparently a lot of locals agree. There was a nice mix of tourists and natives on the Friday night I was there.

You could easily identify the locals because they knew all the old timers in the band.

Like the atmosphere, the food at Prejean’s is everything a tourist would expect Cajun cuisine to be – spicy and delicious.

Never mind the fact that crawfish season ended nearly three months ago. Tourists don’t concern themselves with the mating cycles of mud bugs.

But you know what? When they come to a Cajun restaurant in Lafayette, Louisiana, they expect to get them some doggone crawfish.

Prejean’s is happy to oblige.

I ordered the crawfish platter which included crawfish bisque, crawfish pie, fried crawfish, and crawfish etouffee. I also had some crab bisque, crab au-gratin, hush puppies and a smoked corn pastry thingee on the side.

Each dish is smothered in so many delicious spices, sauces and seasonings, nobody’s going to notice that the crawfish were frozen rather than fresh.

Where do I start?

The crawfish pie was a life changing experience. I’d always wanted to try one and here was my chance.

It didn’t disappoint. It was a small little pie crust topped by a toasted brown-yellow layer of cheese. Inside was a delicious mixture of baked crawfish, cheese and spice.

Let’s put it this way, Prejean’s crawfish pie is now on my list of the top things I’ve ever eaten in my life.

The fried crawfish were excellent too, with just enough seasoning in the breading to keep them addictive.

The etouffee was also delicious, a rich orange sauce smothering the crawfish and white rice. Not spicy at all, but very tasty nonetheless.

The crab bisque was unbelievable. Thick, spicy corn chowder loaded with crab. What made it so decadent was the massive quantity of melted butter floating in every spoonful. It had to be the richest soup I’ve ever tried.

I’m not sure authentic Cajun food necessarily always has to be spicy, but that’s what the tourists expect. Prejean’s really delivered with the crab au-gratin, by far the most mouth tingling dish on the table. It was a casserole of crab, melted white cheese and lots and lots of spice.

Regrettably, I couldn’t even finish it all – a rare occurrence for me, and a tragedy in this case.

But I’ll be back. I’m not ashamed to admit it. I’ll gladly stand in line with the tourists for food this good. And just think, I won’t even have to get my shots first.

Rating: Bought the Shirt!