Messed Up on Martinis and Meatballs

Marchetti's
Cranston, Rhode Island


Sometimes everyone needs a little Italian.

And if there's one thing Suit 420 is good at, it's gettin' some!

Food, that is.

And on my recent trip to Rhode Island, the place where it all went down was Marchetti's.

Marchetti's is owned by brothers David and Donald Marchetti, and it has been around for over twenty yeas.

Now, if you've ever seen the movie "The Departed," Marchetti's is the type of place that the mob bosses would have hung out at while they consumed their alcohol and planned their next crime.

And one of the owners, David, looks like a mob boss.


The inside is dark, and there's old gangster pictures all over the place.

As for the food?

I'll never be able to go to an Olive Garden or Macaroni Grill again.

When I arrived, the place was jam packed, so I put in for a table, and headed off to the bar while I waited.

This is where I became really impressed.

Marchetti's had martini's for $2.85 a pop.

In fact, while I waited on my table, I downed two martinis, and one glass of wine, and was able to pay for it for under ten bucks.

Not bad, I thought.  It's always a plus when you can get out of an Italian restaurant with both arms and legs attached and no kneecaps busted.

Someone at the bar told me they used to serve box wine by the glass for $1.10. Nice.

After my three drinks, Suit 420 had a little buzz going on.

Of course, being Suit 420, I had a buzz when I walked in the door -- but that's a different buzz.


Pretty much this is how everything was looking to old Suit 420 at that point.


It wasn't too long before the waitress took me to a table and handed me a menu.

Wow.


Was there anything they didn't have. And could it get any LESS expensive?

Appetizers included Garlic Bread, Fired Calamari, Clams Casino, Stuffies, Chicken Wings and many others.

And the highest priced appetizer was 7.95 -- the Calamari -- which I ordered.

Marchetti's also has $5.95 sandwiches, ranging from meatball, sausage with cheese, sirloin steak or grilled chicken.

Impressive, I thought.

But I wanted a full meal, so I ordered the Veal Parmesan.

Based on the prices, I was a little worried perhaps it might not be the greatest. 

After all, there's no such thing as cheap and good . . . right?

As I waited, I downed a few more martinis, and checked out the scenery.

There are literally old mafia/jazz-like pictures everywhere.

I saw Sinatra. Dean. Connick, Jr.

And, of course, Elvis.


It wasn't too long before my calamari arrived.

And I must say, it was delicious. The calamari wasn't overcooked.  It wasn't chewy.  And the breading didn't overpower the fresh, salty flavor of the seafood.


Not much later, the Veal Parmesan arrived.

It was good, but I decided shortly thereafter I definitely should have ordered the chicken instead.

Suit 420 just likes chicken.


That's the Southerner in me. What can I say?

I managed to finish most of my meal, but couldn't quite get it all down.

But all in all, it was a good meal. A dadgum good meal.

I walked -- or partially stumbled thanks to six martinis -- out of Marchetti's with a full stomach.

And best of all, my wallet wasn't hurting after this meal either.

On the way out, I couldn't help but think about the movie The Departed again.

Suit420 was now full and feening a smoke. Where were my Yankee friends now, I thought.

I was tempted to seek some mafia smoke connections, but decided I didn't want to end up dead in a dumpster -- not yet anyways.

Rating: Seriously Thought About Buying the Shirt.

Hankerin' for "Hash" Browns

AJ's Restaurant
West Warwick, RI


If you're like Suit420, over the Thanksgiving holidays -- or any holiday -- you wake up hungover and feeling like crap virtually every single day.

And if you're like Suit420, you'll agree that the best cure for that hangover is a greasy breakfast full of meat and eggs.

Well, actually, the best cure is Suit420's favorite smoke, but that just leads to greasy food so it's kind of a one-two punch to kill a hangover.

And this Thanksgiving Suit420 found himself up in West Warwick, Rhode Island.

Now, being from South Georgia, there's one thing I've learned over the past few years about Yankees.

Them folks can draink!

And I don't mean sipping on beer.  I'm talking shots.  Lots of them.

But if I were one of the unfortunate folks who were born up North, I'd probably drink a lot as well to hide my misery, as well.

On this particular morning, Suit420 had taken a lot of shots the night before, and was feeling like pure crap.

I needed a smoke, followed by a greasy spoon breakfast.

And it just so happened that West Warwick, Rhode Island has the perfect place for that:

AJ's.

AJ's is a small, mom and pop diner that's been around for -- depending on who you ask -- "several years."

And AJ's happens to be known for it's superb breakfast.

So Suit420 grabbed a smoke for the ride, and headed up to AJ's, which was only a 3-mile drive from where I was staying -- which was a good thing because I was still a tad buzzy from the night before and was working on another one on the ride.


As soon as I pulled into the parking lot I knew that this was the place for me.

It looked like I was pulling up to an old house or some type of apartment.

Definitely not a Denny's or Waffle House.

I got out of my car, walked around the corner, and finally found the main entrance.


Ignore the fancy BMW out front. AJ's isn't that type of place at all.

When I opened the main door I was surprised.

The place was full of people -- which is always a good sign.

There was a young couple sitting in the corner.

A table full of old men sitting around talking about the weather.

And a table full of old ladies talking about old men.

The waitresses were busy hustling around the restaurant.

One of the neatest things was they had a small counter top -- no they don't serve alcohol -- where you could sit and eat and watch them cook the food.


I always like places where you can see the cooks in plain sight.

It makes me worry less about finding someone's nasty hair in my food.   Or the cooks doing something to my food.

You never know about them Yankees.

I was approached by a nice waitress, and she led me to a table for two.

I ordered some orange juice, water and iced coffee, and opened up my menu.

Holy crap.

They had everything I wanted, and the prices were dirt cheap.

I'm talking five dollar omelets, and ribeye and eggs for 8 bucks.


Since I was hungover -- and had the munchies -- I decided to order a lot of food.

And that was one of the fun parts.

Being from the deep South, there is a big language barrier between me and New England folks.

In fact, virtually every person I talk to -- even if just asking one question -- immediately responds, "where in the hell are you from?"

I get so tired of it I start responding, without missing a beat, "Long Island."

And the waitress at AJ's didn't disappoint me.

Suit420 decided to go with the Virginia ham, eggs, hash browns -- my favorite of all the browns -- bacon and toast.

All that for right around 6 bucks. So I ordered my food and decided to look around and check out the scenery.

That's when I discovered that there is an entire other section to AJ's, and it was full of customers as well.

And that's about the time I saw a girl walk in wearing a "Connecticut, USSA" sweatshirt.

Interesting.

Normally, I would use that as an opportunity to start a conversation, and find some special smokes while on the road.

But I had no need for that on this trip.  My Yankee friends took care of me and my cloves.

I didn't have long to look around.

At AJ's, despite the place being jam packed, they pride themselves in having your food ready quickly.

It actually was on my table in less than 6 minutes.

Impressive.

But even more impressive was the taste.


I'll start with the ham.

It was Virginia Baked ham, so you know it has to be good. And it was fried perfectly.

I could cut it with a fork, and there wasn't any fat on it.

I ate it my normal way -- covered in syrup.

Suit420 has a habit of putting syrup on all breakfast food. You should try it sometime.

Next, the eggs.

The eggs were just average. That may be because Suit420 prefers grits mixed with his eggs, but Yankees don't know anything about that.

The bacon was, well, bacon.  Awesome.

But the best part of the meal was the hash browns.

In fact, they were -- without a doubt -- the best I'd ever eaten.

They were fried to a crisp, yet still maintained their potato-like inside. The outside was brown and crispy, and made for some good eating.



When the bill came due, I tried to pay with my debit card, but AJ's only accepts cash.

Good thing they had an ATM.

So I got my cash out and paid the waitress.

With a full stomach, Suit420s hangover was now on its way out.

All I needed now was a post-meal puff, and I would be ready to take shots again with Yankees that evening.

Which would give me another excuse to visit AJ's the next morning!

Rating: Would have bought the shirt if they had one.