Stalking Helicopter Ben

Silver Dollar Bar

50 North Glenwood St.

Jackson, WY

I swear it was a coincidence.

No. I’m not stalking Ben Bernanke.

But it is true that Suit757 and “Helicopter” Ben were in the same tiny Western town of 8,000 people on the same night.

The most dangerous man on Planet Earth and his cadre of Federal Reserve banksters and financial elitists were just flying into Jackson Hole, Wyoming on their private jets the night I happened arrive in town.

These self-styled Masters of the Universe (MOTUs) come to Jackson every summer to plot the destruction of the world economy secluded from the prying eyes of the great unwashed they are robbing every day by manipulating interest rates and devaluing our fiat currency.

I guess I must be one of the many unwashed suckers because my plans for dinner at Jackson’s famed Million Dollar Cowboy Steakhouse were thwarted when I read the sign on the front door stating it was closed for the night for a “private party”.

Hmmm.

You see, cowboys, gamblers and bank robbers have been hiding out in this far-western Wyoming town for over a century.

Glad to see the tradition continues.

Ben Bernanke and his Federal Reserve predecessor, Alan Greenspan are the most prolific bank robbers in human history.

It was right here in Jackson Hole exactly one year ago, Bernanke announced his QE2 scheme – a second round of trillion dollar money printing (politely named “quantitative easing”) to enrich the federal government-owned big banks and impoverish everyone else by making the counterfeit green paper in our wallets worth less and less.

In fact, it was Bernanke himself who is responsible for his “Helicopter Ben” nickname when during a speech in 2002 he whole-heartedly endorsed Milton Friedman’s theory that the Fed Chairman can always pump up the economy by dropping dollar bills out of a helicopter.

A good deal for the lucky ones who scoop up those dollars. Not so good for the purchasing power of the dollars in everyone else’s wallet.

Now, one year later, the Wall Street barons feeding at the federal trough are waiting with bated breath for Bernanke to announce another “QE3” helicopter drop here in Jackson Hole.

Yep, even MORE money printing. Even MORE interest rate manipulation.

Never mind the fact that interest rates are already at the lowest in American financial history.

Never mind that artificially low interest rates and money printing is exactly what caused the current financial crisis Bernanke is trying so desperately to fix – with EVEN MORE artificially low interest rates and money printing.

Duh!

How ironic then, that the dinner plans Bernanke thwarted led me face to face with 2,032 of the only weapons available to thwart his economy-destroying schemes.

Welcome to Jackson’s famous Silver Dollar Bar in the historic Wort Hotel.

The huge bar top is in-laid with 2,032 uncirculated 1921 Morgan Silver Dollars.

That’s a lot of coin.

And thanks to Helicopter Ben, each of those silver “dollars” is now worth almost forty bucks.

Think about that for a moment.

In 1921, you could exchange one of your dollar bills for one silver dollar coin. Eighty years later, it takes almost 40 of those bills.

What changed?

Not the silver dollars. Those coins have been imbedded in this Jackson Hole bar for eighty years. They haven’t moved.

Bernanke can’t just print more silver.

It’s the value of that green piece of paper that has changed. It’s lost 98% of its value.

It makes me mad enough to want to march down the block to the Million Dollar Cowboy Steakhouse and demand those robbers give me my money back.

But I think I’ll have a beer first.

After my first sip, I appreciate the locally brewed flavor and realize I just laid my Grand Teton Amber on the top of a bar that is worth nearly 100 Grand.

That’s a heck of a successful investment for a bar that hosted illegal gambling up until the Wyoming bureaucrats stepped in during the 1950s.

The gamblers and cowboys have been replaced mostly with tourists who come in to gawk at the silver loot.

Like any good Western tourist bar, the Silver Dollar serves up some good local brew.

In addition to the Grand Teton Amber, I tried the Mighty Bison Brown Ale, brewed just over the Teton Pass in Victor, Idaho by Wildlife Brewing.

My bartendress from Boston said it was her favorite.

I have to say, she has good taste. For a Yankee.

Nutty and malty, the Mighty Bison had good strong flavor for a brown ale.

Even though it was 85 degrees out, I couldn’t pass up one of the Silver Dollar Bar’s most famous dishes, the corn chowder.

Chock full of bacon, potatoes, corn, onions and vegetables, it was toped with a thick layer of melted cheese.

Really good. Especially with my Mighty Bison Brown.

Speaking of bison, you just don’t see the big wooly animal on menus every day.

That’s why I couldn’t wait to bite into my main course – a big old bison cheeseburger with a unique sweet and zesty homemade potato salad on the side.

The bison burger was cooked to a perfect pink but was still a bit dry.

That’s he only problem with bison. It’s really too lean of an animal to make good burgers.

That’s why God invented big fatty cows – to make drippy, greasy burgers out of them.

Bison should really get out of the burger business. They should stick to what they do best – standing around in the middle of the road posing for pictures from out-of-town Easterners like me.

Being the most powerful man on the planet, I wonder if Ben Bernanke ever gets to drive around Jackson Hole snapping picture of big, hairy native animals. Or is he too busy and too important to do anything but sit around plotting the destruction of the world?

As it turns out, Helicopter Ben’s big Jackson Hole speech ended up being a big dud.

No QE3.

The lamentations of the Wall Street bankers could be heard all the way out here across the Tetons.

But not to worry. Interest rates keep falling. The Fed keeps issuing more debt. And the Masters of the Universe keep working toward the destruction of the world.

Helicopter Ben won’t let them down.

There may be no QE3 announcement in Jackson Hole, but it is coming, my friends, it is coming.

And then QE4. And QE5. And QE6. And QE23…

Suit757’s advice?

Drink lots of beer.

And buy some silver coins.

Rating: Seriously Thought About Buying Shirt.